6,264 Words, And Introducing Darcy

Ergh. I'm kind of bored with what I'm writing right now, but hopefully I will hit my stride soon and move things closer to what I want to be writing instead. Today I introduced Henry F. Darcy III, the CEO of Darcy Publishing, and Todd Bigsley, the CFO. Olivia meets both of them at a meeting for Globetrotting Gurlz, and she is insulted by how rude and dismissive Darcy is. Bigsley, however, seems to have taken a shine to her cousin Eleanor "Ellie" Bennet (the copy editor at GG, and her roommate), and she is very pleased with this development.

As the meeting continued, it became impossible to ignore Bigsley’s constant adoring glances towards Ellie. When she spoke, he seemed to be listening particularly intently. When she told a geeky editing joke that no one really seemed to get, Bigsley’s laugh was the heartiest of all. Furthermore, she noted the frequent instances of eye contact between the two. This would have been difficult not to note, however, since this was just about the least characteristic “Ellie” behaviour that Ellie had exhibited since that time that she confided in Olivia that she “hadn’t taken a shining to” the group of boys at a wedding they had attended recently, after they started throwing meat at women and tallying scores based on whether the meat stuck or not, referring to it as a “meat fight.”

Todd Bigsley, it seemed to Olivia, was perfect. Darcy, on the other hand, seemed to be everything that she had heard, and more. She could not stomach his arrogance, or the way that he all but announced to the Globetrotting Gurlz employees that he was too important for them to merit his time. Ellie had even wondered aloud to Olivia as to what could account for his taciturn disposition, and suggested that if Bigsley could be such good friends with the man, he must have redeeming qualities. She was unable to dismiss people, or fail to give them the benefit of the doubt. Many would have considered this to be a good quality, and on a lot of days Olivia may have as well, but sometimes it just made her seem naïve and unworldly. Unlike Ellie, Olivia found that her quickness to judge was the best way to deal with a world that could easily knock the wind out of you if you weren’t careful. And if she had learned anything in this world, it was that you can never be too careful.

“I feel like that session went perfectly. We made a great deal of progress, and I found them to be a very pleasant group,” Bigsley smiled as him and Darcy made their way out of the conference room and headed towards the elevators. Olivia, whose cubicle was placed perfectly so as to overhear the conversation without the knowledge of the speakers, knew as well as Darcy did that Bigsley was not reflecting on the pleasantness of the group so much as the pleasantness of one particular person in that group. Her ears perked up, and she strained to hear this conversation that she had no business listening in on.

“You were conversing with the only pleasant one in the group. The rest seemed particularly vapid and uninteresting, which is an unshocking development considering that they work at a teen magazine that spells ‘girls’ with a ‘u’ and a ‘z.’”
“I have to confess, I was particularly taken with Eleanor. But I don’t think you’re being fair, Darcy,” Bigsley continued. “What about her friend, Olivia? I found her to be very agreeable.”

“What do you mean? She is tolerable, but not handsome enough to tempt me,” Darcy practically spat his words. “Pursue Eleanor if you choose, but you’re wasting your time if you think that I’m going to double date with you at the cinema.”

Olivia’s heart felt like it had dropped down to the bottom of her stomach. Sure, she hadn’t been preoccupied with pleasing Darcy; in fact, she assured herself, it was probably advantageous for her that he didn’t like her. What if he had? Then she would have had to talk to him.

But even so, the sting of being deemed “not handsome enough” (who the fuck says that, anyway?) by some rich English douchebag who has obviously never valued the virtue of politeness was enough to make her hate herself for not working hard enough to be beautiful. It was a fleeting feeling, however; it was soon replaced with simple hatred for Henry F. Darcy III.

Yesterday when Jill and I were writing at the cottage, we elaborated on a beautiful concept that is just too great not to share:


Henry Senior was also particularly known for his magnanimity; the Emma Darcy Foundation, a charity he had launched in the wake of his beloved wife’s death donates money to various organizations in Africa that dispense AIDS drugs. The face of the organization is Taylor Kitsch, most known for his role as sexy bad-boy Tim Riggins in the NBC drama Friday Night Lights. However, his star was continuing to rise into the stratosphere after he had recently been cast in the remake of the 1995 Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen blockbuster smash It Takes Two, which is slated for a 2013 release. Kitsch has been cast to play Steve Guttenberg’s former role as Roger Callaway, the single father to Alyssa Callaway, and love interest to Kristie Alley, who would be reprising her role as Diane Barrows with hopes that “the second time’s the charm.” Alley’s star is also currently on the rise following her blistering turn on Dancing With The Stars (DWTS, for those who do not actually watch the show) and her newly minted status as a cougar. Henrik and Daniel Sedin, Swedish hockey-playing twins known for their on-ice switcheroo antics when thrown out of face-offs, had recently signed on to take over Mary-Kate and Ashley’s former roles as identical strangers. The picture is to be directed by Gordon “The Vampyre” Toody, a moody and unconventional director who is most known for his insistence on wearing a vampire cape his the restraining order against him that was taken out by David Boreanaz after he wouldn’t take no for an answer to his invitation to DB to attend his post-modern conference on Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Needless to say, this picture was sure to be a hit, and would bring much publicity to the Emma Darcy Foundation.