It's too early to feel this bad about my novel.

I'm now ahead of schedule at 6,000 words.  I was so unhappy with yesterday's effort that I didn't want to post anything at all.  I need to spend some time today thinking about a direction that my book can take that I like, so that I don't end up writing stuff that I don't even appreciate over four hours.  But, Jill wanted to see what Ron Tortellini is like, so here is his introduction:

Penny Lane took a seat in the third row of the news conference at the Air Canada Centre, poised with pen to paper, ready to take notes.  She might have congratulated herself for being so prepared if she had not immediately noticed the tape recorders and other superior technological devices that surrounded her.  Everything is a superior technological device, she thought bitterly to herself, except for a chalkboard.

She scanned the room, and did not see a chalkboard anywhere.  Not a good start, she thought to herself.

While Penny Lane had been pleased with herself for remembering Ellie’s press pass and glasses, she was wishing that Ellie’s eyes weren’t so damn bad.  While she could not see particularly well with the glasses on, she knew that she needed to wear the glasses to pass as Ellie.  She made a mental note that she should find some hipster glasses without a prescription as soon as possible.

Suddenly the doors burst open and a salt and pepper-bearded man walked forcefully toward she front of the press room.  The tension in the air was palpable; the relaxed and friendly chatter amongst the press was replaced by a nervous silence.  Penny Lane was by no means a hockey fan, so she was unfamiliar with the man at the front of the room who was commanding everyone’s attention by simply being there.  She couldn’t see him very well either, which did not help.

“Okay,” he simply said into the microphone, then sat back.  A brave man in the front row wearing thick-rimmed glasses and a faded red t-shirt raised his hand.  Without speaking, Ron Tortellini gestured to him, indicating that he was allowed to speak.

“Phil Carr, the Toronto Sun,” he began.  “The Leafs have lost four of their five pre-season games, including a particularly embarrassing loss to the New York Islanders.  Was that what you were hoping for to give the team momentum leading up to the 2012-2013 season?”

Even though Penny Lane could hardly see, she could tell that Ron’s face had quickly formed a sneer.

“Was that what I was hoping for?  Did you really just ask me that?” he responded impatiently. 

For many this might have been a rhetorical question, but not for Ron Tortellini, apparently.  He was clearly waiting for this Phil Carr character to say something in return.  The entire room bristled uncomfortably.

“Well, I—” Phil began, obviously flustered.  “I wasn’t sure what you thought about those results,” he stammered.

“Okay, Phil, let’s think about this.  Do you really think that it’s possible that I’m pleased with the fact that we lost four out of five games?”

“No,” Phil responded quietly.

“And what kind of momentum do you think that will give us going forward?”

“Um… Not very much?” Phil answered, embarrassed.  He got up and ran out of the room.

“He’s crying!” an idiot bro in the back announced after the door swung closed, sounding amused.  It seemed as if everyone in the room burst into mean laughter, except for Penny Lane, who felt disgusted, and Ron Tortellini, who sat up at the front unmoving, like a cat.

“Damien Cox, Toronto Star,” a bald man began.  “I think that you should trade five first round draft picks to secure the Canucks back-up goaltender.”

“Was there a question in there, Cox?” Torts shot back, annoyed.

“You can imagine that I raised my voice at the end if it makes you more comfortable.”

“Get out.  I’ve told you before that I don’t need your ridiculous advice.  How have you not been fired yet?” Torts wondered aloud.

“One day you’ll see, you’ll all see!” Damien Cox shouted as he raced out of the room. 

Was it just Penny Lane, or was this press conference stranger than most?

Oh, and Indigo and Jill, I would love to Skype in to your writing sesh!  Indigo, could you please text me when you two are starting?