Day 20-- Stripping Is Playing a Larger Role Than I Thought It Would

How is everyone doing? It's day 21! We are getting close!

I forgot to blog yesterday, but most of what I wrote wasn't very interesting. I wrote this two days ago, and I thought you guys would like it a lot more. I am going to pass the 35,000 word mark today, and I'm hoping to see the light at the end of the tunnel soon. NaNoWriMo is making me incredibly tired. In a section prior to this excerpt, I copied and pasted an episode summary of "Doppelgangland" from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. It was almost 350 words.

This scene won't make very much sense if you haven't seen Magic Mike. And if you haven't seen Magic Mike, what are you doing?

“Your girl didn’t tell you?” Dallas drawled, pretending to give Cole a sympathetic look. “Ooh, you know females, and how they like to run their mouths.”
“What’s he talking about, Chloe?”

“It appears as if he just quoted Justin Bieber.” They both shot him very disappointed looks. Not only did he inexplicably quote Justin Bieber, but the lyrics also did not make sense given the situation.

“I’m from Blackwood, what do you expect?” Dallas shrugged his shoulders.

“Better,” Chloe and Cole said simultaneously. It might have been a cute moment between them if the fact that they were appeared to be in danger wasn’t increasingly dawning on them.

“We aren’t here to talk about my Blackwood upbringing,” Dallas said, sounding increasingly annoyed that his attempts to intimidate were repeatedly being foiled.

“We’re here to talk about your taxes, actually,” Cole said in a pathetic attempt to distract and deflect.

“Two of us are,” Dallas smiled. “But something tells me that one of us doesn’t know very much about accounting. Isn’t that right, Chloe?”

“Well that’s sexist, don’t you think? Singling out the woman and accusing her of not knowing about accounting? I am so offended I think I need to leave. Cole, let’s go.”

“Back to Juliet’s Bookstore and Bakery?” Dallas asked, moving in front of the door to block their way. “You really thought I didn’t know?” It was an unpleasant surprise, much like a knife in a snowball.

“It wasn’t written on your crotch, so yes. I assumed that you weren’t aware of it.”

Dallas snickered a mean snicker. He was having fun, and it scared Chloe. She assumed that what he considered to be fun wasn’t exactly the “fun for the whole family” type.

“Your mouth really is going to get you into trouble one day, Chloe.”

“People have been saying that to me since I was six. I also haven’t been listening since I was six.”

“You made a big mistake coming here today. You seem smart. You must know that I can’t just let you walk out of here after everything that you have seen.”

“I’m really not that smart,” Chloe responded. “I didn’t see anything! I’m usually half asleep at best. If you let me go, I wouldn’t have anything to tell!”

Dallas seemed to be uninterested in more talk; this made a lot of sense, of course, since at any moment Chloe was likely to bring up Buffy the Vampire Slayer again. I did not appear that Dallas was interested in hearing a detailed summary of any episodes, as if you are not delighted by Doppelgangland, then you are not likely to be delighted by anything. Instead of uttering another word, he snapped his fingers once, not breaking eye contact with Chloe.

In response to his snapping, the employees sprang into action.

“This isn’t a drill,” she heard someone shout, indicating that the bakers seemed to have many ways to fill their time, none of them involving actual baking. Despite having a better understanding of what daily life was like in the bakery, she had no further insight into where those cronuts were coming from.

The drills had clearly paid off. While the shirtless “bakers” came from all corners of the bakery, they were soon all positioned in a line. Dallas blew a whistle—where did he get the whistle?—and they all started marching in unison. The lights dimmed, and were replaced by flashing lights in all the colours of the rainbow. Dallas then started chanting, and the others echoed back.

I do know and I’ve been told (I do know and I’ve been told)
Big Dick Richie’s got a cock of gold! (Big Dick Richie’s got a cock of gold!)
Let’s give it up for the virgin kid (Let’s give it up for the virgin kid)
Anything you want, he won’t forbid! (Anything you want, he won’t forbid!)
Now Mikey’s got a lot of love (Mikey’s got a lot of love!)
What he’s got down low fits like a glove! (What he’s got down low fits like a glove!)
Sound off (One, two)
Sound off (Three, four)
Sound off (One, two, three, four, three four!)

Chloe was never sure of the purpose of the chant, but regardless, it chilled Chloe to the bone.

After the chant had concluded, music began playing—but where was it coming from? Who had set it to play? She looked all around and saw no one. The bakers began seductively dancing in unison, with a move that involved humping the floor clearly the most popular. They were closing in on her and Cole, forming a ring around them. Chloe did not notice this at first, as it was difficult to not be entranced by their moves. When she finally caught on, she grabbed Cole’s hand and dragged him out of the melee. They ran for the exit, not sure of where they were going since the only certainty was that they were in danger.

It would be the hottest group of men that Chloe would ever run away from.